The Outsider
by CidOtaku
Summary: I guess this is an angst story...I wasn't really sure. This is a songfic from Perfect Circle's Outsider song. It just reminds me of Lain. It's basically Lain thinking of Alice and Reseting the Wired.


The Outsider

Serial Experiments Lain songfic by CidOtaku

A/N: Whee! Inspiration is pouring from my pores! Eww…actually, not really. That'd be kinda gross. Um, yeah…so anyway, I heard this song on the radio, (a very good source of inspiration for me ^_^) and it reminded me of Lain, so here's a songfic from the song The Outsider, by A Perfect Circle! I own nothing! Nadda! Zero! Naught! Nil! And any other weird words for nothing! Yay! High school sucks!

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_Help me if you can_

_It's just that this,_

_Is not the way I'm wired_

_So could you please,_

_Help me understand why_

_You've given in to all these_

_Reckless dark desires you're--_

            Was this all meant to happen? Am I just a puppet of fate, a toy in the eyes of some cruel child? Why does everything go wrong? I've had to Reset the world. I've had to watch as my only friend, one of the very few people I can truthfully say that I care for, Alice, be upset and hurt. Am I some artificial program? To be deleted by my creator? An experiment? Is this the way I am wired? A cold, unfeeling thing, like my Navi?

_Lying to yourself again_

_Suicidal imbecile_

_Think about it, put it on the fault line_

_What'll it take to get it through to you precious?_

_I'm over this_

_Why do you wanna throw it away like this?_

_Such a mess_

_Why would I wanna watch you?_

            It can't be…I have feelings! I am not the Lain in Cyberia. Nor the Lain that watched and humiliated Alice! Lain is Lain, and I am me. I am a high-school student. I go to the same classes as Alice and her other friends. I have a mother, father, and sister. I am not the one striking fear into the hearts of people in the Wired…although they say it is a girl with short hair, save a strand of bangs that falls chin-length…and a "X" shaped band holding that strand…and I have the same uncommon haircut…No! It is not me!  

_Disconnect and self-destruct_

_One bullet at a time_

_What's your rush now?_

_Everyone will have his day to die_

_Medicated_

_Drama queen_

_Picture perfect non-belligerence_

_Narcissistic_

_Drama queen_

_Craving fame and all its decadence_

I am omnipresent. I am almost a god…although I wish it weren't true…I want a normal life! I want to forget…everything…the look on Alice's face when she thought I betrayed her…the Wired…the girl who killed herself and then emailed people after she was dead…I would Reset, but I would still remember…

_Lying through your teeth again_

_Suicidal imbecile_

_Think about it, put it on the fault line_

_What'll it take to get it through to you precious?_

_I'm over this_

_Why do wanna throw it away like this?_

_Such a mess_

_Why would I wanna watch you?_

            There is only one thing I can really do, though it would pain me…I have to start it all over so that nobody knows what happened, there is no Wired, there is no Lain. I will never be able to see Alice, and she cannot miss me, since you can't miss someone you never really met…I will still watch over her. Make sure she is happy. Make sure she has the life I will never be able to live.

_Disconnect and self-destruct_

_One bullet at a time_

_What's your rush now?_

_Everyone will have his day to die_

_They were right about you_

_They were right about you_

**…RESET…**

_Lying to my face again_

_Suicidal imbecile_

_Think about, you're putting it on the fault line_

_What'll it take to get it through to you precious?_

_I'm over this_

_Why do you wanna throw it away like this?_

_Such a mess_

_Over this, over this_

I am omnipresent. I am also ageless. As she grows up, I stay the same. A young high school girl. I see her happy, and I wish I could be with her, be the reason why she laughs. But I was never one for humor. So then, I think of how much I want to comfort her when she is sad, wipe away her tears. But I don't exist, do I?

_Disconnect and self-destruct_

_One bullet at a time_

_What's your hurry?_

_Everyone will have his day to die_

_If you choose to pull the trigger_

_Should your drama prove sincere_

_Do it somewhere far away from here_

            So I watch. Alone.


End file.
